What are the rules for darting these days? With all of our celebrations of diversity, why are we still singling out those with bubbly colons?

Ok, I fart pas’d in front of my boss today. Sorry, boss. My colon was feeling oppressed.
Maybe I’ll call in sick for the next week.
Or pretend it didn’t happen.
That’s probably easier.
Unless I have to fart pas again.

I’d like to rebrand farting as a form of intimacy, like not wearing makeup.

But not weird rebranding like farting equivalent to kissing.
I am gassy, not disgusting.

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